Jessica & John

Update

2012-01-30T16:12:00.000-08:00

About 8 weeks ago we were able to see a Neurologist and he started John on a new med and took away one of his other medication that didn't ever do much. We have seen a huge improvement so far. He no longer has 45 min repetitive seizures and he only has a seizure a week..His seizures have changed a lot, and you wouldn't even notice that he had one( they only are lasting 5 to 10 seconds). We went to the Neurologist again a week and a half ago and he increased John's dose of medicine, he is already at the max dose but he said some people just need a little stronger and then they are good to go.. Well, John has had one seizure since trying the new dose so we will see what happens.

We are feeling super blessed about this and are very grateful for a Neurologist that actually knows what he is doing, and has seen John's specific seizures. But, we just wish he didn't have the side effects from the medicine... ( Double vision, nausea, and feeling disconnected from his body) I hate that he has to feel that way. Life has felt so much more normal, I can't even remember the last time I saw him have a seizure. I was having some major anxiety issues because all of this ( watching my husband have 5 plus seizures a day was taking a toll on me), but since the seizures have been controlled I have felt very at peace, but then I feel bad because John has to deal the horrible side effects. I asked the doctor what if the extra dose doesn't work then what do we do? He said we will Just play around with Johns meds until we get 100% control with medications.

Sophie

2012-01-12T10:27:00.000-08:00

This little girl is 18 months old, and deserves her own post. Here is a little bit about Sophie.

Sophie loves:

Momma and Dadda-She is very much a momma's girl though

Owls

apples-I should say she loves calling any fruit that's round an apple

Babies

Her Babba-I know she shouldn't still be drinking from a bottle, but she loves it.

Kitties-any animal really

Being outside

Anything sweet

Dancing

Dora

Elmo

Getting her fingernails painted- she usually only has patience for one hand at a time

Music

Books

Her new Kitchen

Coloring

Being spoiled by all her grandparents and aunts and uncles

Sophie dislikes:

Getting her diaper changed

Getting in her car seat

When people leave- She usually cries when people leave

Meat- she is not much of a meat eater

Being told No

Sophie can throw quit the tantrums, she is very dramatic, and has lots of personality..We love you so much girlie!

Random

2012-01-12T10:12:00.001-08:00

Here are some random quotes that have been on my mind, and I just LOVE them.. I shared these in a talk about a year ago and came across the first one on pinterest the other day and it made refer back to my talk...

“God expects you to have enough faith and determination and enough trust in Him to keep moving, keep living, keep rejoicing. In fact, He expects you not simply to face the future; He expects you to embrace and shape the future—to love it and rejoice in it and delight in your opportunities. God is anxiously waiting for the chance to answer your prayers and fulfill your dreams, just as He always has. But He can’t if you don’t pray, and He can’t if you don’t dream. In short, He can’t if you don’t believe.” Elder Jeffery R. Holland

“The Lord… will try us until He knows what HE can do with us. He tried His Son Jesus. Thousands of years before he came upon the earth the Father had watched His course and knew that He could depend upon Him when the salvation of worlds should be at stake…. He will continue to try us, in order that he may place us in the highest positions in life and put upon us the most sacred responsibilities. It is in moments of disappointment, heartache, and loneliness that we often make decisions that forge our faith, molds our character, and fortifies our convictions about the only source of strength and solace that satisfies…And that is Jesus Christ.”

Lorenzo Snow

Numb

2011-11-28T20:01:00.000-08:00

I figured its been 2 months since I wrote, so I should update. Where to start? Since John's seizures have been more "controlled", he has started having hour long repetitive seizures about once a week. So now, instead of having 5 or more seizures a day he usually has about one a day, usually in the morning when he wakes up. Nice way to wake up right? And then one of the repetitive seizures a week.. But who knows, it could all change its pattern in a week or two.

I don't really know what to think at this point. I feel like no one can help us, and the specialist who might be able to help us, is so hard to get into... I have pretty much gotten all his doctors to call and harass them, so we should be getting a call this week, about how soon he can see the Epileptologist . He has an appointment in March, but there is no way we are going to wait that long. We will see a neurologist tomorrow, but I am not getting my hopes up.

John has been on 2 anti seizure meds and he has maxed out the doses, and is now on a third medication. Normally, if the first 2 meds fail, a third won't make a difference. So then what? I am not really sure what the doctors will do now. John and I both don't love the idea of more medications.. But, most doctors will look into figuring out if he will be a candidate for brain surgery. At this point, we would pretty much do anything for the seizures to just go away. But, I am not sure how close we are to surgery being the next option.

Some days I can't believe this is our life. I always thought I would get married, have children, and we would live happily ever after. I mean why wouldn't that happen, everyone else seems to be living the life I thought I would have. Sure, I don't know every one's problems, and I know people have way harder trials than this, I just can't help but notice those who don't. I am sorry but money problems, messy houses, being up all night with a child is NOT a big problem. What I would give if those were my ONLY problems. I never thought that my 28 year old husband would have such major health problems. I mean this isn't even the only health problem he has. He also has keratoconus, which pretty much means he is going blind in one of his eyes (there is a surgery that can fix this), along with asthma, and prehypertension. I mean seriously, when is he going to catch a break?

Lately, I have really been struggling to not compare my life to others, I am obviously doing a horrible job. I just feel really alone in this, John and I are going through this together, but its affecting both of us differently... This has changed the both of us so much. It kills me to see the bright, smiley happy guy I married slowly become this person, I barely even recognize.

Some people have asked me if his medications have made him quiet or seem different. My answer to that is HELLO he is Depressed... He is grieving the person he was, and All of his independence has been stolen from him. Everything he loved to do has been taken away. He lives in fear of having seizures constantly. We have been living in hell for the last year and a half and its starting to wear on us.

I had a break down the other week at my parents. Everyone just kept asking what can we do to help...? I just told them there's nothing you can do. Because they can't take this away. I think that's what I have been most frustrated with. No one seems to know what to do for him. I have tried to "fix" him myself, with diet, exercise, doterra oils, going to bed early, and doing anything and everything I can do for him. I have prayed 1000's of prayers, gone to the temple, fasted, and now I am just fresh out of ideas.. I just feel Numb...

Big news!

2011-09-08T22:43:00.000-07:00

Big news! John hasn't had a seizure for almost a week.. We met with his neurologist last week and he bumped up his medicine and it seems to be doing the trick... He can listen to music without a seizure! I know our prayers have been heard and I hope the medicine continues to work because I could use to this life! ha.. Seriously though, I know it isn't by chance this is happening right now.. John has 4 weeks left of school and 6 weeks until his clinicals. Some may say its a coincidence but I know its just a tender mercy from the Lord. Life has just been crazy the last year and half and it would be so nice to be able to relax and have some normalcy. I have enjoyed watching John play his guitar. I haven't seen him play for probably a year.

Life would be so easy

2011-09-01T15:01:00.001-07:00

The other day John and I were talking about what our life would be like if he never had another seizure from here on out.... His response was, "Life would be so easy". I don't think anyone would even understand the amount of relief and stress that would be taken off our shoulders. It makes me want to cry sometimes thinking about how enjoyable life would be without these damn things. Sometimes I think about what most "normal" people get to do and worry about at this time of their lives and wish that was us. We should just be worrying about school, getting a job after schools over, when to have another baby, and saving our money. Not, what if his seizures get worse, what if he can't do his rotations in November,then what? What if he has a seizure during a rotation, what if the medicine never takes them completely away and he has to have brain surgery, etc.... Most days its hard for me to not think about his seizures. If he has a good day, we get excited but then we are both anxious about when the next seizure is going to come. I wish John had a "normal" case of Epilepsy, According to his current doctor he's never had a patient like John, comforting huh!

We are moving back to Utah in 6 week but who is counting? Honestly, everyday here I have been in a constant battle with myself to be happy . That might sound dramatic but its the truth. Since we moved here it's just been one thing after another. John's first week of school our apartment flooded and he was in a car accident, a couple months later someone broke into our car, few months later John was in another car accident( don't worry he doesn't drive anymore, stupid seizures), this July John was in a bike accident because he had a seizure and he was so lucky he didn't die or have any major injuries, And now, I was told I might have something wrong with me because my bilirubin has been elevated. So I have to follow up with a GI doctor and can't get in until Sept 19... But I am happy to say we have seen a decrease in John's seizures, thank goodness. I am hoping it will just be a matter of getting the right dose of medicine and the seizures will be gone for good.

Even though its been a hard year, I know we have been watched over, and certain people and experiences have been placed in our lives at times we have needed them the most. My faith has grown a lot and I know now more than I ever have that we have a Heavenly Father that loves us and wants the best for us. This trial is just one of those experiences that is molding us to be what he wants us to be.

In other news we already have a place to live in Utah , and its funny because we will be living right next door to my sister and John's brother. Yes, my sister married his brother for those of you who read this blog and didn't know. We will be saving so much money living in this apartment, it will be a lot smaller than we are use to, but saving an extra 500 a month will be nice. Especially, when you are living off of student loans. I just can't wait to be away from 100 plus degree weather. Never did I think I would be so in love with Utah, but I hope I never have to leave again. I love it there and can't wait to live close to all my family and friends again.

I hope people who read this blog don't think I am the most negative person ever, because I am not. I love my husband so much and it kills me to see him have to go through all this. I am going to try to post more often so its not these sad, depressing posts!

Today

2011-08-18T14:14:00.001-07:00

7- Woke John up bc his alarm didn't go off ( I always set mine just incase)and then I went back to bed

9- Sophie is up and we cuddle in bed and watch Sponge Bob.

10- get ready for the Library

11- Meet up with friends and go to Music and Movement at the Library. ( She loved being there)

12:20- Drop Johns lunch off at school

12:30 I lay Sophie in her crib for her nap

1- check my blogs,pinterest, and facebook

2:23- Eating animal crackers and thinking how good I have it! I love being a stay at home Mom!

How cute is she in this pic.. It has nothing to do with today but I just miss her being so tiny!

Wedding

2011-07-27T09:07:00.001-07:00

John's brother, Christian was married last Tuesday in the Timpanogos Temple. Here are some pics of the Wedding day.

Happy Birthday to my Sophie Girl!

2011-07-24T18:15:00.000-07:00

I can't believe just a little over a year ago we were blessed with our healthy, perfect baby girl. I am so grateful for Sophie and all the happiness she brings to our lives. She is such a good girl and was seriously such an easy baby.

Some words she says :Mama, dada, caca (for gross stuff), nine (which is no in German), Jak ( her grandparents dog), off, up,tickle tickle, nana, kitty kitty,doggie, bah bah, hi, yeah,uh oh and she will sometimes mimic words we ask her to say. She understands a lot of what I say which is so

fun. She is just getting bigger and bigger everyday. She's not walking yet, but is very close.

We celebrated her birthday July 2nd and it turned out perfect,with the help of my sister Brooke and mom. We had a bbq with our families and I made a giant cupcake for Sophie. We also had Sweet Tooth Fairy cupcakes for everyone who came. Sophie was in heaven with all the attention. She is one very loved and spoiled little girl. Love you Sophie

I will warn you this isn’t a happy post.

2011-06-16T23:02:00.001-07:00

This week has been ROUGH! I have a sinus infection, which means I have no energy and constant pain, John had finals this week so I have been a single mom the last two weeks. Oh and I can’t seem to snap out of this angry, depressed mood I have been in for quit some time.

Why am I depressed and angry? I literally see my husband have multiple seizures every single day! I don’t even remember a day that he hasn’t had a seizure.Can I just say I hate Epilepsy, I hate that there isn’t a cure for it, I hate that my husband has seizures, I hate all the uncertainty in my life right now, I hate the depression and anxiety it causes me on a daily basis, I hate that I have no Idea how this is going to affect us in the future, I hate that this could kill him, I hate how much stress this has caused our relationship, I hate that no one in my life understands , I hate that I can’t ask my husband to run to the store because I forgot something ( he can’t drive bc of the seizures), I hate that I couldn’t fully enjoy my newborn baby who I prayed and begged for so long because I was soooooo worried and stressed out of my mind because I didn’t know what was going on with my husband, I hate that my husband can’t listen and enjoy music like he use to (music causes John to have seizures), I hate when people tell me it could be worse because this is pretty bad and his condition could get worse, I hate that his medicine isn’t working, Ugh the sad thing is I could go on but I will stop.

Sorry this is so negative but this is how I feel and I am working on trying to get use to this new life. Some weeks are better than others, this week I am just frustrated that John has been on medicine since March and nothing has changed. Luckily, his doctor has changed up his medicine so we are hoping,praying that we will see some decrease in seizures soon. We had an appointment this week and have to keep track on how many seizures he has a day. The doctor is amazed that John has 5 seizures a day and is actually able to function. I don’t really know how I should feel about his comment.

John has been pretty amazing with everything. You would think I am the one who has Epilepsy by the way I am talking. I think its just hard for me because I am the one who has to see it and while he's having a seizure he's not aware of it happening.But He is doing amazing in school . I am so grateful that he hasn’t let this hold him back from accomplishing his goals.John has clinicals coming up in November so we are just praying that he will be seizure free by then.

Some days I can’t believe everything we have had to go through since we have been married ( Miscarriage, 2 and a half years of infertility,and Epilepsy). I am very aware that things truly could be worse. We are blessed with the sweetest little girl you could ever ask for among other things. I don’t know what I would do without Sophie….Heavenly father knew what he was doing when he sent her at the time he did. I am more aware everyday of how I am so NOT in control of a lot of things in my life. I never would of guessed we would be going through this when we first were married. I love this quote "The trick is to enjoy life. Don't wish away your days, waiting for better ones ahead." Marjorie Hinckley. I find myself wishing the days away and I need to STOP. I have a lot to work on but hopefully I will learn what I need to from this experience..

Trials...

2011-03-18T10:45:00.000-07:00

John was diagnosed with Temporal Lobe Complex Partial Seizures this Thursday. They are a form of epilepsy. It was like a HUGE weight had been lifted when the doctor confirmed it. I on the other hand already knew this, I have seriously researched everything on seizures and epilepsy and knew exactly what kind he had. It really probably sounds weird that we are happy about this news but John has been through a lot with this and it has been really hard on me as well. I will start from the beginning and let me tell you it has been going on for a freaking long time!

So when John and I got married we got pregnant after only being married for 4 months. Well that put a lot of stress and pressure on John. He was only half way done with his bachelors degree and we really weren’t ready for a baby. We then miscarried taking a lot of pressure off John but he started to notice he was having these times where he wouldn’t be able to talk for just a few seconds and he would just stare off. He just thought he had a lot on his mind being married, thinking he was going to have a baby, plus working, and school. So eventually those staring spells just went away and life had calmed down.

Probably a year and a half or more went by and John started working in the ER full-time, was in his last semester at UVU and was serving as the Pre-PA Club president at UVU. Oh and he was applying to PA schools. He would go to school at 8 in the morning, get done with school sometime around 12pm or later, then go to work at 5pm and work until 5am the next day. He was busy and his body wasn't getting the rest it needed. Well those staring spells came back and again he thought it was just stress and anxiety. He had been to the doctor about these staring spells because I forced him to go. The doctor gave him some anxiety medicine but that didn't fix the problem. Once school was over he was able to start working normal hours at the ER and those staring spells went away.

6 months or so went by and life was good. He had been accepted to multiple PA programs and we found out we were having a baby. The day after we found out John didn't get much sleep bc he had an early shift at the hospital and I noticed he had a staring episode. I was super frustrated and was almost mad that they were back again. He just tried to shrug them off.

Well after probably 6 more months went by those staring spells got worse and began looking a lot different. I was really concerned and forced him to go to the doctor. I thought they might be seizures. I had seen a show on epilepsy and it sounded a lot like what John had. I went with him to the doctor appointment, I think I was about 8 months pregnant and really wanted this figured out. He was scheduled for an EEG, this is when they hook a bunch of electrodes to your head and can see the electrical activity of the brain. It took awhile to get the results. We had already had our baby and moved to Vegas by the time we got the results. The EEG showed some spikes and sharps in a certain area of the brain, meaning he could be having seizures but the test was inconclusive and needed further studies to be diagnostic of seizures. When I asked John the results of his tests he said everything was FINE!!! No it wasn’t fine. I knew something was wrong and he was in some serious denial.

The seizures were starting to happen more often. We finally got on medicaid because I stay at home with Sophie and he is a full-time student and his program prohibits him from working. He finally went to the Neurologist. While meeting the doctor he actually had a seizure in front of him. The doctor thought they could be seizures and wanted to order more tests. For some reason our Medicaid changed and we had to start all over again by going to a primary care provider and get their referral to go to another neurologist because the one we had seen didn't accept the new Medicaid. I was feeling pretty defeated and thought this was never going to end. It felt like we weren't ever going to find out.

After a long road, a lot of fasting and praying we found out on Thursday exactly what is going on. The hardest part of this for me other than having to see John struggle was not being able to open up to anyone about this. He really wanted to keep this private. No one, not even our family knew this was going on until about 9 months ago.

John's seizures aren't probably what you think of when you think of someone having a seizure. He doesn’t fall to the ground and start shaking. His seizures only last for about 20 seconds. He can’t speak, his legs and sometimes his hands move like normal body movements but he doesn’t have control of them and he turns really red in the face like he’s holding his breath. He isn’t even aware sometimes that he had one. After he has a seizure he can go back to whatever he was doing. Sometimes he will slur his words right after they happen too.

I am sure you can only imagine how hard this has been on him; being in PA school is hard enough but having to deal/ hide this has been awful. He has seriously done so well in school and has never had trouble with grades or anything. If you have any question feel free to ask. Keep him in your prayers and pray that this new medication that he is on will keep him seizure free!

VEGAS and our BABY!

2011-03-05T09:41:00.000-08:00

NOTE: This was written on March 5 my husband forgot to post it for me. I know you all have been dying to see what I have written. Sophie is 8 months today which also mean we have lived here in Vegas for 8 months! It has gone by sooo fast, thank goodness. It hasn't been too bad but I really miss Utah and being close to family and friends... The weather here is amazing right now and I cant wait to take Sophie swimming once it gets warm enough.

John has 2 more sessions left of his didactic phase of school, which is just the class portion of PA school. He has done amazing in school and has great grades. He really likes school and is very happy with his chosen profession. He will do the clinical portion of school in Utah, so we have about 7 more months left here in Vegas.

Sophie is growing like a little weed. She sits up on her our, eats pretty much everything (loves banana's), says " Mama", which of course I love! She hates getting in the crawl position, but is very mobile and loves to stand up . She has two of the cutest bottom teeth ever. She is a really good baby and gets more fun everyday. I can't believe just eight months ago she joined our family.

Anyways I know all anyone ever likes to see is pictures of Sophie girl so here ya go and Happy 8 month birthday little girl!

I miss this tiny girl

Dress-up with Sophie

2011-03-03T12:34:00.001-08:00

Playing dress-up with Sophie…. New blog post coming soon.

4 Months

2010-11-06T23:53:00.001-07:00

I can’t believe my baby is already 4 months old. I have been amazed how fast she is growing and developing. It kind of makes me sad. I am trying to savor every minute I get with her. She is sleeping so well at night but as of late her naps are sometimes a fight. Here’s a list of things she is doing.

She can roll over from her belly to her back and back to belly.

So smiley and giggly(when she wants to be).

She loves the big bath.

She’s grabbing her toys and anything else that’s infront of her

Talking to us all the time these days. We love it.

She has become a little sassy. I don’t have any idea where she got that from. haha

She loves sucking her thumb. Sometimes she accidently chokes herself.

She likes to mimic what we do with our tongues and mouth.

She loves food and if you take her bottle out of her mouth she freaks, sometimes she turns purple. She has done this since she was a few weeks old.

She wants to sit up so bad. Sometimes she looks like she is doing crunches bc she’s trying to sit up.She is not loving the car seat these days.

She’s doing so well on her tummy and actually doesn’t fight tummy time anymore. She’s getting very strong.

She loves sitting in the Bumbo.

When I was putting her to bed tonight, I was thinking about the day she was born. That day seems like it was forever ago, even though it really wasn’t. It was such an amazing experience and I sometimes can’t believe I physically carried and gave birth to her. She was so worth the wait and she will never know how much we wanted her. Well atleast not until she has her own children. Here’s some pictures of our little Sophie.

Sophie Giggling

2010-10-08T20:04:00.000-07:00

Its been a while…..

2010-08-18T21:35:00.001-07:00

Well Its me Jessica.. John has done a pretty good job updating our blog every now and then. Last time I personally posted was Feb. 11, 2009.. In that post we had just celebrated our 2ndyear anniversary. We had Johns PA applications still to fill out and send off. Also I had mentioned how we were hoping for a baby for the upcoming year. Well, here we are living in Vegas. John is in PA school and I am at home with our sweet baby girl Sophie. She turned 6 weeks old yesterday! Which is the reason I wanted to start blogging again. I am kind of sad I didn't document anything while I was pregnant.

Pregnancy had its ups and downs but I am so grateful after almost 3 years of "trying"… I became pregnant! I was pretty shocked when I woke up that morning and the test was positive. I literally was shaking. I had been on clomid for three months to help me ovulate and after the 3rd month of no success I had to take a break. I emotionally couldn't be on that medicine and have another month of disappointment. So I didn't make an appointment with my doctor for another round of clomid. I remember just getting down on my knees and praying... I recall saying “I cant do this anymore. I am just going to be happy with what You have given me and bless us with a baby when we are ready". Well of course when I finally got off the medicine and put it in the Lord’s hands, we got pregnant!

I was so excited the day I found out I was pregnant. I wanted to tell everyone but because of my miscarriage 3 years ago I was very hesitant. I was so scared that I would miscarry again that I didn't tell people until I was 15 weeks pregnant. I didn't tell my clients until I was about 20 weeks pregnant and by that point it was already obvious.

During our first pregnancy we had an ultra sound and found out that our baby was no longer alive. So when we had our 8 week ultra sound for our next pregnancy and I saw our baby's heart beating I just couldn't believe it! By that time morning sickness had started and stayed until I was about 20 weeks. I lost 8 pounds from being so sick but I definitely made up for it during the last 20 weeks.

So now on to the last part of my pregnancy. At this point John and I were living at my parents. We had all our belongings in storage and we were commuting back and forth to Provo and Orem for work. John would be starting PA school July 6th and orientation would be on July 1st and 2nd. I was due July 23rd.. The plan was I would stay in Utah and John would move to Vegas with the help of his amazing parents and then drive or fly back to Utah when I was in labor. Most people looked at us like we were crazy when we told them our plan but I just had a feeling everything would work out. Also I wasn't about to find a new doctor. I loved my group of doctors! Plus our insurance would still be covering us since John had PTO (Paid Time Off) that he would be using for the month of July.

So John left June 29th with his parents, all of our belongings and both of our cars. They also had his parents truck which was full plus a trailer attached. Seriously they looked like the Clampets driving down the highway. At that point I was 37 weeks pregnant and feeling better than I had throughout my entire pregnancy (I know I am weird ). At my 36 week appointment he checked me and I was 60% effaced and 1 and 1/2cm dilated.. I was pretty excited hearing this and my doctor seemed impressed. He told me due to our situation with John starting school that he thought it would be good to start stripping my membranes at the following appointment, a week away. I went to my 37 week appointment and they stripped my membranes (Holy freak that hurt!). I had progressed even more that week to 2 cm and 70 % effaced.

John came home on the 2nd of July to work his last two shifts at the hospital. Poor guy went to orientation on the 2nd and when that was over drove to Utah with his parents and had to work the next morning at 5! So on the 3rd of July my family had tickets to the stadium of fire to see Carrie Underwood! My mom had been nervous from the day she bought those tickets. She didn't want me going into labor while we were at the stadium of fire. Which didn't happen. Carrie Underwood was awesome, along with the fire works! But Sophie didn't like the fireworks. They were so loud I know she heard them in my belly. I had never felt her move as much as I did while watching the firework show!

We went home that night completely exhausted from walking around all day. Plus, I stayed up way too late with my family the night before. John and I skipped church the next day to catch up on some very needed sleep. At this point I had been losing my mucus plug for a few days now but I didn't think anything would be happening for a few weeks. I was a little disappointed that I still had 3 weeks left. So that Sunday I was feeling a little different. I can’t really explain it. I kind of felt sick and just knew something was off. I remember thinking to myself ‘maybe today is the day’. John had to get to bed early that night since he had work at 5 in the morning. His last shift in the ER :(. I climbed into bed that night at 11 and dozed off for maybe 20 minutes and couldn't go back to sleep. So what do I do? I go upstairs and munch on some food and watch Mr. Holland’s Opus…haha! I was watching the movie and needed to go to the bathroom for the millionth time. After going to the restroom I stood up and felt a little gush. I thought ‘did I just pee my pants or was that my water breaking a little?’ So I stood there and waited, then a little more fluid came. Then I went and changed and it kept happening. I didn't want to wake John up unless I was sure my water broke. So I woke up my mom and told her what happened. I then called my doctor and he said “it sounds like your water broke.” I was so excited and shocked!!! I woke John up and we headed off to the hospital.

At this point it’s 1 in the morning. I go in and the nurse tests the fluid and sure enough my water had broke. So they started me on pitocin and I decided to get my epidural right away. I was pretty scared of it but it wasn’t bad at all. I tried to go to bed after that but yeah right! I couldn’t sleep at all. Finally around 5am I dozed off a little, but at six was woken up by my new nurse, who by the way I loved! She checked me and I was a 4. I hadn't really been feeling any pain. Then I started feeling lots of pressure and she checked me again and I was a 6! Then things started to move fast. I was a 9 in no time and feeling lots of pain and pressure! I thought if the whole idea behind an epidural is that you DON’T feel anything. The anesthesiologist came and gave me more anesthesia and then I felt good; 30 minutes later I was a ten. Everyone was at the hospital. My mom, my sisters, grandma, my in-laws and Kelton. They came in and quickly said hi because it was time for me to start pushing. I let all my sisters and mom stay in and watch. I started pushing around 11:30 and pushed for 2 hours before they called the doctor!! I was in so much pain the entire delivery! By that point I was telling the nurse and everyone to just knock me out. I was dead serious too haha!

Finally the doctor arrived and he found out the baby was posterior which is why she wasn't coming out so easily. With the help of the forceps and an episiotomy (ouch) she was here!!! She came out not crying due to the cord being wrapped around her neck but like 30 seconds later she gave out a nice cry. I felt like I could finally relax once she was crying and I just cried. Minutes later I finally got to hold my sweet baby. She has so much hair and weighed 6 pounds 3 ounces and was 18 and a half inches long. I didn't get to hold her long since she wasn't breathing very well. They took her to the NICU for a few hours and she had to be on nasal c-pap. It just helped her lungs expand and then she was fine.

Labor was the most amazingly painful and exhausting experience ever! Luckily I have already forgotten how bad it was. I was so grateful to have John with me the entire time. Since Sophie was born July 5 John decided to miss his first day of school on the 6th to be with us. I stayed in Utah for two weeks and John was able to fly down on the weekends. It was really hard to be without him but now we are here together living in Vegas. I am trying not to think about how much I miss Utah, my friends and our families. We have had many visitors but I will save that for another post.

3 years and then some…

2010-03-27T16:47:00.001-07:00

Jess and I recently had our third anniversary and I wanted to capture a few moments we enjoyed in SLC. We took this opportunity to go back to The Inn on the Hill, where we spent our first night as a married couple. It was fun to revisit some memories.

We first grabbed some lunch from the Joseph Smith Memorial Building Cafe. Jessica loves the sandwiches there. I snuck a few shots of the SLC Temple while finishing up in the cafe.

Then we got checked into the suite. Here is Jessica on one of the comfiest beds I’ve ever slept on, notice the inklings of a baby bump. Lil’ Sophie’s a growin’.

Here are a few shots from the Inn. The bathroom was huge and had an awesome jetted tub. And for some reason I really liked the painting above the fire place.

And here is the front of the Inn. You can see the SLC Temple and the Capitol Building is easy to see from behind the Inn.

My favorite part about staying here was that it felt like our own little place, rather than staying at the Grand America or another overly popular place. I guess if I want it to stay our “own” I shouldn’t be sharing this.

It was a fun weekend that we didn’t want to end, so much so, that we actually booked another hotel for one more night before heading home to Utah Valley. I know Jessica was bummed we didn’t do our tradition of going to eat at The Roof but we enjoyed some of our other favorites like, The Pie, and a new favorite, Eggs in the City. Thanks for showing us Cara.

Jess I have now known you for five-plus years and been married to you for three of those five, and I have only just begun to understand the depth of my love for you! You are the best and my favorite thing about my day… everyday! I love you.

Our Little Miracle!

2010-03-15T11:18:00.001-07:00

Jess and I have had a busy past six months and it’s official we are PREGNANT!!! It’s really exciting and we know it’s not an it, it’s a little girl! The first GIRL in the Holbrook clan.This first ultrasound was done at 8 weeks and 2 days for our sake. Since we had previously miscarried. It helped settle our nerves about this little one. She had a strong and fast heart beat at 160 bpm.

This next ultrasound was taken at 20 weeks, but we snuck a few more in between. I guess that’s just one of the many benefits of working in the ER. Anytime Jessica would feel anxious we would go get a quick look at our little one. Below is a video of the baby with hiccups! We were also attempting to guess the sex of the baby. It’s not a simple thing at 16 weeks. I spoke with some of my ultrasound tech friends from work and they got us in for a quick look. They were 85% percent sure that it was a girl; they were RIGHT! I guess if there’s only a 50/50 percent chance of getting it wrong so it could have been luck. Before the 20 week verification of the sex we had already bought two 3 packs of little girl bodysuits. Cara got us another cute 3 pack bodysuit collection. She is going to be a spoiled little girl.

We have been trying to find a name that we can both agree upon. We were quick to find a boy name or two that we liked. But as for a girl we were in trouble. Then for some reason we both jumped on board the Sophie train. We like Sophie Marie Holbrook! Sophie is short for Sophia; which is Greek and stands for wisdom. We like the shortened form Sophie; this spelling is the German/ French derivative of Sophia. And that works perfect for me because of my German heritage and my love for the German/Austrian culture. I have heard from numerous people that Sophie is an extremely popular name right now. But all I have to say about that is look at her parent’s names; John and Jessica. Popular names much?

I actually have a friend at work that while she was telling me all of there possible baby names she said, “I don’t want to name my kids some overly popular name like Joe, Jake or John…. uh, I mean…. John is a great name! Uhh…”. It’s ok Annalee, I hate your name! Just kidding. But you know you tend to put your foot in your mouth at least once daily, so I was ready for it. I later cried myself to sleep. LOL!

Pioneer Days Celebration 09

2009-08-28T12:26:00.001-07:00

I finally had the opportunity to make it out to the Manassa for The Pioneer Days Celebration. I have always been in school during the celebration. It was a great experience getting to know Jessica’s extended family. For those of you who aren’t familiar with Manassa, it is a tiny town in Colorado a mile wide and a mile long. This small town has some far reaching roots and some amazing traditions. They have the record for the most hamburgers sold during the celebration.

At the park watching some concerts after the parade. I work with Chris Blinzinger at the ER and he used to live in Manassa. I told him I would make sure to go see his name on the Jack Dempsey statue. This is Jessica’s cousin, Tori. I’d never been to a Moto-X, but she did awesome. Later some pro guys did some sweet tricks. Jessica’s Grandparent’s house where we stayed for the trip. I’m excited that we were able to go and even more excited that Andrew, my younger brother, will soon be a part of the Durfee/ Sowards clan. He’ll be the new guy next year if he is able to make it.

Flash Back: Missionary Memories

2009-08-09T09:41:00.000-07:00

Okay, this doesn’t look like “Quiet Dignity”, the motto of the MTC… but to my defense I didn’t even want to wrestle. My companion and I were walking by and this room when we saw this elder (the one on top of me) was wrestling another, so we watched. I think I had laughed or something and the Elder said something like, “Do you think you can do better?”

I replied, “No, I don’t want anybody to get hurt.” But he thought I was meaning I would hurt him. I was actually worried about myself! Well, he grabbed me and I did my best to stay alive! But I’ll have you notice that one arm is holding up like 350lbs, until a second later when my head went crashing into the ground. It was pretty bad because the MTC dorms have a nice thin layer of carpet laid over concrete.

As you can see I had rug burns to pay for as penitence and worst of all it was winter and we were required to wear our suit jackets, but I couldn’t put mine on because I didn’t want to get my jacket dirty. I was the only elder in a sea of dark colored suits, a beacon of light because of my white shirt. When I got bandaged up I could wear my jacket but then it would sting having something pressing against it. All in all it was a stupid thing to do. But the Elder later told me out of all the people he wrestled I had given him the hardest time. Nice!

Flash Back: Missionary Memories

2009-08-02T19:12:00.001-07:00

“I find myself tired once again physically but more emotionally drained than ever before. Something has been taken from me, something that has opened my eyes to many things, but mostly the numerous amount of blessings in my (life). I can’t believe all the crap in the world! Which brings me to the question, why am I so blessed? What did I do to be so blessed?” -Jan. 31st, 2004

Sometimes in life we are shown the grander scheme of things. I recall this time on my mission, after the beautiful/ cold time of year (Christmas) when we focus more so on others. As a missionary you are constantly striving to focus on others. I wrote this passage in my journal after my “greeny” and I tracked all day long, just before we felt we should make our way home we were allowed in to a humble apartment by a gentleman at the brink of disaster. We attempted to teach him about the restoration of the gospel but realized that wasn’t what he needed at the moment. I simply allowed the man to talk… and talk he did. It seemed more of a confession the way his life story poured out. Amongst the man’s sobbing and our consolation the new missionary struggled to keep up with the thick dialect that wasn’t taught in the Missionary Training Center (we were taught ‘hoch deutsch’ not ‘wienerisch’). After learning of the man’s horrible upbringing with an abusive father and many problems that have seemed to compound themselves over time. He explained that he was just about to have to go back to jail because of mistakes of his own and decided that life wasn’t worth living anymore. He prepared his vice of choice (heroin and cocaine) and before he could go through with it we showed up at the door.

A long discussion ensued with a challenge given and an appointment to meet again. I recall being worried that he wouldn’t make it to our next appointment and it dawned on me that I wore a ring my parents had sent me for Christmas. The ring is your typical ‘CTR’ ring with German lettering ‘WDR’ (Whaele Das Recht = Choose The Right). I offered him my ring and told him what it stood for. I also told him I wanted it back. I thought that if he had to return the ring he would focus on that one thing and make it through the next day or two without thoughts of suicide. This guy was a big guy, not necessarily fat, just large in stature. It was a perfect reminder because it was too small for all of his fingers but too big for his pinkie, so in order for him to wear it without it falling off he had to clench his hand in a fist. A constant reminder having your hand clenched at all times.

As my companion and I walked home I looked up at the sky and tried to conceal my tears. To this day I’m not sure how much my companion understood. I had taken a beating from each of the man’s words which depicted his nightmarish childhood, stories of a despicable father beating his mother, bringing home other women and throwing the nicely prepared meals in his mother’s face. It was a grotesque display of humanity that left the son tired and scarred. I burst into to tears as I thought about the many blessings that have been given me. A loving family, good friends and many opportunities to succeed is only the beginning of my fortune. I will never forget this lesson of gratitude.

That night I was required to call my mission president to ask permission to continue meeting with this man because of the man’s addictions and other various problems. To my dismay my mission president denied the request and felt it was too dangerous for us to return. I was upset but realized that he had to ensure the safety of over 170 missionaries, all of which are someone else’s children. It was disappointing because the purpose of a mission is to serve others and bring them closer to Christ and that is a difficult thing to do in my mission. I continued my mission and tried not to think about the man anymore. It was close to a month later when I was to being transferred to a new area that the man found some other missionaries. He chased them down in the subway and told them that Elder Holbrook needs his ring back and to tell him thanks. I never got my ring back but I’m glad that he knows he can go to any of the missionaries for help. I only hope he is doing better and dealing with his past more constructively.

(In the apartment in Vienna after making calls and a long day)

Cruisin’

2009-07-18T21:28:00.001-07:00

Jess and I took the opportunity to go enjoy some alone time.... well because we can! We don't have any ‘Y’ittle ones yet and I have this whole year before I even have the prospect of going to PA school. So we found the least expensive vacation we could find, i.e. "cruisin". We have never been on a cruise and decided it would be a good way to relax and not have to worry about how to go here, there and everywhere; the boat would simply take us, plus take care of our need for nourishment.

Here is Jessica and our cruise ship, the Carnival Paradise.

Jess and I saw a couple of kids feeding the seagulls some ice cream. I guess it didn’t sit very well with them

A picture of Catalina Island…. Avalon city is just to the left of this picture.

Jessica enjoying the beautiful weather in Avalon.

A compiling of numerous photos taken from where the divers come out of the ocean and enjoy the beautiful skyline.

Jessica would drink a cup of hot chocolate almost every meal I guess it didn’t warm her up enough this time.

Ensenada, Mexico

La Bufadora (the blow hole) and supposedly the largest in the world which is found just south of Ensenada.

Here is our dinner group.

Last day of the Cruise… enjoying the sunset.

…really enjoying the sunset!

And they lived happily ever after.

We both decided cruises aren't the best... vacations. Actually Jessy is the one that stated over and over again how wonderful our Belize trip was! Once again 'thank you Dad' for a fabulous trip that will be forever in our memory. This cruise was for us to be alone and from our own means as a much needed break. I enjoyed the vacation! Just lounging around was amazing! Jessica enjoyed watching all the piglets stuff their faces from the greasy cruise food. It was crazy how much food the others on the cruise could eat. I also think it would be more fun to go somewhere with more to see (Bahamas) instead of feeling molested by the locals in Ensenada's Gangland. We also agreed that cruisin' could be much more fun with friends and family to enjoy the plentiful activities that didn't quite peek Jessica's and my interest. Anyway, sorry for the drought of posts. We should do some much needed backposting.

Take the Picture!

2009-03-08T14:47:00.000-07:00

Have you ever taken a picture of someone but you were actually taking a video? It's hilarious! Watch how long it takes Jess to realize I'm not taking a picture!

CELINE DION: Best/ Worst Night Ever!

2009-03-08T14:01:00.000-07:00

Jessica finally had the opportunity the attend the Celine Dion conert I had purchased over a year ago. I am happy to announce that I am no longer a member of the Celine Dion Fan Club. It was a year membership I had to endure to be able to buy the tickets. And to show you how close we were...

Don't worry about that guy standing next to Celine... he was freaking out, waving his arms everywhere. He was lovin' it! I will be honest I was impressed by the concert but it no way did I go to concert of my own free will. I felt a little like Matthew McConaughey (yep, that's how you spell his name I looked it up) in "How to Lose a Guy in 10 Days" (another thing I watched because of how much I love Jess).

And in the words of any of the Durfee girls, "John done good!"

Before we made it to the "amazing" concert we had an eventful trip to SLC. The Jeep's battery had been acting up a bit so I went in bought a new one. The only problem was that it wasn't only the battery that had gone bad it was the alternator, so the "check gauges" light was on the whole ride up. Then I noticed the when we were almost to Cara's apartment that the car wasn't responding normally and the lights were dimming. I didn't want to get stuck in the middle of downtown so I pulled over and turned off the car. We called Cara to come pick us up. And the plan was to jump us and make it to her apartment to charge the battery. I still had my Dad's ancient battery charger in the Jeep, we just needed an outlet. When Cara picked us up we bought some jumper cables and an extension cord. We somehow got the Jeep to Cara's apartment and then rushed off to the concert a couple of minutes late, with the stress everpresent of not kowing how we would make it home tonight.

The opening act was some impersonator that Jessica didn't appreciate much. I thought it was going to be the highlight of the concert, then Celine Dion sung the song with Andrea Bocelli. No, Andrea Bocelli wasn't present but a recording. It was still awesome! Here is a snippet of the duet.

Jessica recorded almost every song via our little camera and seemed to enjoy each and every moment. Here are a few pics of the concert.

Well the concert was good but that's not the end.... we still need to get HOME! Cara picks us up and we check out the Jeep. Our plan is to use the fog lights instead of the head lights and no other electronics that could suck more juice from the battery.

We are about 10 miles from home when the fog lights becoming dimmer and dimmer. Then we saw the clock on the radio go out... this happened last time and the car became unresponsive. A road sign signals the Lehi exit is a mile away. We were freaking out because the lights had now completely gone out! Jessica used her cell phone to light the way or so she thought. It actually made it more difficult to see outside. The exit ramp almost snuck right by us, but we were able to roll our way to a gas station to plug in and start all over again.

We sat there for a minute and decided to call my dad to see what he thought of our plan and after a short discussion he decided to come pick us up. He ended up jumping the Jeep and we followed him home without lights and the car died perfectly at the auto shop. We had to push it into a parking spot.

If you were to ask Jessica if it was worth the money and the ridiculous fiasco to make it to her beloved Celine Dion, she would undoubtedly answer "YES!" with tears of joy! Here is a picture of her enjoying every fleeting moment. I would agree it was quite the experience.

Two years !!

2009-02-11T22:35:00.000-08:00

So this past weekend John and I celebrated our 2 year anniversary! We stayed in SLC and went to "The Roof" . It was alot of fun to just relax and be together. I am so grateful that I married John . Our wedding day was def. the best day of my life! I am excited to see what year three has to bring us (we are hoping for a baby)! This year should be exciting John is getting ready to apply to PA schools, so who knows where we will be headed next year!

2009-02-11T22:13:00.000-08:00

This blog is to my sister Cara..This is super random.....I was looking through pictures and I noticed I am wearing my favorite earings that you LOST!! Also it makes me want to cut my hair!

Lonely..

2009-01-25T22:23:00.000-08:00

I am missing my husband terribly tonight!!! I saw him for church and off to work he went. Lastnight he worked till 5 this morning and then tonight he works till 5 tomorrow morning and then tomorrow he works 4 in the morning on Tuesday( all his shifts are 12 hours)Wow I am going to very lonely( I want to cry). I miss you lover!

P.S. I will have alot of pics coming soon. Especially since I will have so much time on my hands!

Thanksgiving 08

2008-12-13T12:43:00.000-08:00

Well Jess and I had a good Thanksgiving. My Opa (German for Grandpa) came in from Santa Cruz, CA for the festivities. It was great to see him. We don't make it out to California as often as we used to. My favorite moment was talking having a good conversation and all of a sudden I realized we were talking about sex. He was telling me about the univerlistic truth that women receive and men give. Now it seems pretty obvious since I already told you he was talking about sex but when trying to decipher through his thick German accent and the randomness of the direction of this discussion it can be quite difficult to understand.

Check out this little commercial showing the difficutly of understanding the German accent.

Click Here

My other favorite moment with my Opa was watching "It's a Wonderful Life", a movie I hadn't seen since I was a little one. I think it was the first time I sat down and actually understood it all and it was pretty amazing. My Opa hadn't ever seen it before.

We started out the day at my parent's house with Opa and ended the day up at Jessica's Grandma's house in Grantsville, UT.

Jessica had the opportunity to cut her nieces hair (Addison). It was her first hair cut so that was exciting. She looks really cute in this picture below. She is sitting with her Dad, Justin (Jessica's Brother).

And another video of the little rascal. She learned how to climb up the bench. She is growing up so fast.

Twilight

2008-12-10T20:20:00.000-08:00

Yesterday John and I went to Twilight. The movie started out good, but then the more it went on the less I liked it. We both thought it was really cheesy! Like the baseball scene seriously?!? And the line where he called Bella a "spider monkey" (um no)! I did think Edward was attractive but any ways the worse part about the movie were the people who sat in front of us....The theater was empty and of course they have to come and sit right where my feet are resting!! uhh I was ticked.. Hopefully the next one is better!

2008-12-08T23:02:00.001-08:00

We will be updating soon!

2008-10-30T17:09:00.000-07:00

Jess and I got to go to a BYU game together. It was BYU vs Wyoming. It wasn't much of a game especially because of how hot it was. But it was fun! There are some great pictures below.

I made Jessica buy a shirt with me.

Pretty important completion pinned back in our end zone!

I think Jessica was more excited about Dip-n-Dots than being at the game. Anybody that knows her knows that is probably the only way I was able to convince her to go with me.

One of Jessica's classic faces depicting the feeling of annoyance. This must have been just before she got her Dip-n-Dots.

You have to pay close attention to this picture... at least you did before I cropped it. It was just another picture of Jessica but then we notced the little girl in the back going at it. Gold Digger!

Another Cougar FIRST-down!

Strawberry Days

2008-10-30T16:44:00.000-07:00

I have never been to Strawberry Days before. It is a festival in Pleasant Grove, UT during the summer. I wasn't too excited about it but it really wasn't that bad. I had also never been to the Purple Turtle and we ate there quick before going on a couple rides. Jessica was way excited to see that the Zipper was there. She rode the Zipper with Lauren (Co-worker) at the Orem Summer days Fair. I will admit it was fun! Jess said that I just giggled the whole time.

The anticipation is unbearable!

Cute couple if I do say so myself

Right before the ride started!

Addi's Birthday

2008-10-21T18:21:00.000-07:00

A fun-filled bash at Grandma Carol's house in Grantsville, Utah, where little Addison Durfee turned one. She wasn't quite sure what she was supposed to do with her first birthday candle but she definetly extinguished the flame. Ouch! Oh well it's all about the memories!

Deseret Peak (4th of July)

2008-07-12T08:29:00.000-07:00

For the Fourth of July we went up to "Granny-ville" (Grantsville, UT). Where we visited with Jessica's family and celebrated Brett's (Jess' Dad's) birthday. We were all supposed to go hiking but like usual everyone kind of just rolled over and went to bed. But Bret, Brooke and I decided we would still go for it. I especially was excited because I knew that Jessica would be sleeping in until who knows when, which leaves me staring at the ceiling from about 8am till probably 12pm. That was definitely my motivation. We hiked Deseret Peak and it took about 5 and 1/2 hours total. The picture below isn't from the top. It was taken right before we reached the top and I saw an opportunity to scare Jessica so I took it. My stomach turned a little bit when I was climbing over there.

Here is a picture of Brett and I after the hike.

And a picture of Brooke killing it up the mountain. It was a cool background so we snapped a couple of pictures right here.

A sad day

2008-06-25T21:15:00.001-07:00

So last year on May 5 I found out I was pregnant after about 3 pregnancy test it was official..John and I had been married for only about 3 months....We were both excited even though sometimes I would act like I was terrified but I really couldn't wait!!.. At about 6 weeks all the fun pregnancy "morning sickness" or more like all day sickness kicked in .I was always sick and asleep by 7 (poor husband I was no fun).but A year ago today I was in surgery bright and early to have a D and C.. Four days earlier I was 11 weeks pregnant going to my first doctors apt. My husband, mom, came with me to the ultra sound and there was our sweet little baby.(it was so cute). The nurse said " theres your little peanut".. It was amazing too see that something really was in there. I then asked her well is everything ok ? She gave us the saddest news ever. Well I am having a hard time finding the heart beat..I immediatly burst into tears.. My biggest fear had come true.. SO many emotions were running through me.. Then the nurse started to explain my options you can wait it out or have a D and C.. I didn't even know what a D and C was and I just started crying even more..Then I moved rooms and talked to the doctor..He was so sweet he really comforted me and told that if I waited for my body to actually miscarry the baby its very emotional and traumatic (I had no signs of a miscarriage).. So I decided to go through with the surgery(The following Monday)...So I went home the day of our first doctors apt and tried to have a positive attitude but couldn't help but cry the whole day and many days/months after that..... I just remember when I was leaving the doctors that day I just had this peace and clarity that the next time I get pregnant and from now on I will be a better me physically,mentally,and spiritually. Theres a few reason I wanted to shared this: Its kinda therapy for me too write my emotions but most importantly The lord prepared me a lot for this experience, he also blessed me and my husband above and beyond. I can honestly say even though I wish this had never happened to me and I would of loved that child so much. I know there was a reason for it and it will prepare me for the future..I am truly great full for the gospel and its teachings ..It really helps put everything in perspective even though we may not always understand why bad things happen and why me but also too cherish the time you have with those you love and care for.

My First Card

2008-06-20T18:42:00.000-07:00

So recently I was called to be in the enrichment committee and so far so good. But we are having a craft night in a week, and we are making a bunch of different kinds of cards(birthday,wedding,baby cards,etc.) The card I am in charge of is the birthday cards.. The only problem is I have never really been the most crafty person so when I was told I was suppose too teach girls how too make birthday cards and buy all the paper,stickers,etc. I was a little scared.. But here is my first attempt..And I think I did pretty good job..What do you think??

LUSH STUDIO

2008-05-31T13:50:00.002-07:00

Hi everyone! I have officially left Von Curtis Salon. I am now with a new salon called Lush Studio. It is a great place just up the road from Von Curtis. If anyone has a difficult time finding it I have posted a map (below). It is currently called Envision Studio and is inside an antique looking home with a sign for the John Patrick Hair School. It is in the vicinity of Classic Skating and before the new Midtown Village that is being built. The address is 212 South State Street, Orem, UT 84058. And number, 801-426-5909. Feel free to stop by and check it out.

-Jessica

My Goal

2008-04-16T19:06:00.000-07:00

So I really want to get into shape this summer and I also want to loose 10 pounds by swimsuit weather. Since being married I have really put on a some weight not very fun at all. Now I really need to eat healthy and work out but I really have been lacking the motivation since the weather in Utah has sucked. I much rather work out outside than in the gym but oh well I guess I will just have to suck it up. I should get a before and after picture so we can see my progress.

Just an Update

2008-04-16T18:42:00.000-07:00

So I haven't posted for a little while but not too much is new. I still have that sick rash on my body that itches like CRAZY!! I go to the Dermatologist tomorrow to get impetigo out of my system once and for all. So, this Monday John and I went to the Jimmy Eat World concert and it was really fun. I was super tired before we got there but once we got in I had a lot fun. My favorite was one of the opening bands Paramore. Paramore was surprisingly better than Jimmy (sorry John Jimmy eat world was okay). So, now I am really sad that I bought a Jimmy Eat World T-Shirt instead of a Paramore shirt. Oh well I guess I will get one the next time they come. But I am soo excited that next year around this time John will be graduating! It will be so exciting to be even closer to being done with school and me not having to work :) ( John wants to be a PA so thats an additional 2 years which won't be that bad at all).

Beware

2008-04-10T20:11:00.000-07:00

So last Friday I went to work and when I got home i had the usual little hairs in my shirt( I cut hair and had cut three men hair cuts in a row their hair gets everywhere) but they were irritating my skin.. I didn't think much about it and I just brushed it off thinking that was all I needed to do... But I was wrong.. I eventually started breaking out in hives or at least thats what I thought it was... But I thought this will just go away I put some cream on it but it started spreading!! Thank goodness we have a uncle who is a doctor and I took some pictures and sent them to him so he could figure out what it was.. Later he calls me up and asked me a bunch of questions and he figured out that it must of been from one of the guys hair that got on me had some kind of bacteria and when the hair came in contact with my skin it gave me impetigo.. Who would of thought ...So in about a week all the little spot will go away!!! Beware Hair dressers of clients sick hygiene problems!!

Big girl drinking water

2008-03-30T13:56:00.000-07:00

Jessica is infatuated with this little girl (her niece, Addison). I guess she's kind of cute... oh who am i kidding? Look at her!

The Beginning (Jessica's Version)

2008-03-24T21:09:00.000-07:00

Well, John has been wanting me to write my version so here goes... I had just moved to Provo and started working at Macaroni Grill..So I think it was like the third or fourth day I had worked and the restaurant was really busy and I didn't really know anyone including John and I am just standing in front of the hostess stand and one of the bussers ( John) walks by and tells me " I think your gorgeous".. I am thinking thanks but also how weird!! I mean I don't think we had even talked to each other...Plus I had a boyfriend at the time so I wasn't really interested... Some time goes on and I had gotten this kitten and seriously the day I got the cat my boyfriend at the time was like "I think he is sick and dying " so I am already attached and I end up taking the cat to the vet and I go to work that day and I am sad and John and I have our first real convo about my sick cat..haha.. Anyways I would say that conversation broke the ice between us..

One day my sister Cara (she worked at Macaroni Grill with us) was telling me that John was asking people if they knew if I was and I quote " A good girl" which I am guessing the response was yes or John and I wouldn't of dated.. So I clearly knew John was interested and my sister wanted me to break up with my boyfriend so she started saying things like I think you should date John hes so nice and would treat you better than Dustin, So I started thinking he is really nice to me (he was always helping me at work and just really sweet )and I thought he was cute
so I just started getting more and more interested BUT there was one thing I had to know What kind of clothes did he wear!! hahaha... My sister luckily had seen him in regular clothes and informed me that he dressed well. So the only thing I had to do was break it off with my boyfriend and some way let John know I was interested !!

At Macaroni Grill everyones schedules are posted up in the back so you can see who is working each shift and it was the summer and I wasn't in school so I started picking up shifts on the days John was working or trading shifts so I could work the same shifts as he did ...(he never believes that I did that but I really did) So one day I get called into work bc It was really busy and Luckily John ended up being there so I didn't mind working... At the end of the shift I had already been told I could leave but John was still there so I really didn't want to leave so I thought I can just sit here and roll silver wear and maybe he will come over..... FINALLY he comes over and says " So when are we going to hang out?" I say "well let me look at my schedule" I get my schedule and I think I said something like maybe this weekend and then I inform him I have a boyfriend and he replies " Yeah I don't care"... So that night I call my boyfriend and break up with him! And me and John have been together ever since!!!!

John or Jess... Who's more cute?

2008-03-16T15:18:00.001-07:00

Well folks, come one... come all... step right up. Take a gander at both of these darling little ones.
The gigantic excited baby above is John "Feed me! I'm HUNGRY!" and the petite little strawberry princess below is Jess "I think... cross that out....I know I'm soooo CUTE!"
Two more pictures and it is time to vote. Once again John is above and Jessica below.

Please comment... we will tallying up them as votes to see who is more cute.

The Beginning (john's version)

2008-03-08T10:30:00.000-08:00

Well, it was a typical day as a "To-Go Specialist" at Macaroni Grill. I had a couple of orders and it was starting to turn out to be a nice and busy Friday night. Then I noticed this girl who had just walked in the door. She was gorgeous... in fact when I realized that she just started working here I was ecstatic... (PIC #1: can't you tell I was a little excited and it looks like Juan is out to get you too Jess...) I was so beside myself I went right up to her and told her she's gorgeous. She probably thought I was some weirdo. But It took a lot longer for me to get enough courage to ask her out. I actually didn't even think I had a shot in the first place. That's why I told a buddy of mine (Israel Ingle) about her and that he should ask her out when he came out to visit us (He lives in Georgia). Well, I found out that she had a sister (Cara) that already worked at the "Mac Shack" so I asked her about Jessica. I think I actually did the junior high school thing and talked to a friend of a friend who talked to Cara for me. Like I said I didn't have enough courage to ask her out.

After awhile she noticed me looking at her, i.e. she caught me staring at her a couple of times so I attempted to talk her. Our FIRST conversation was all about Jessica's favorite thing in the whole world... CATS!!! P.S. I'm allergic and have asthma so I wasn't the biggest fan. But at least I had talked to her! I tried the method of doing sweet things so that she might notice me, meaning I would be right there if she needed anything. Oh Yeah, she took advantage of my help. I would setup tables for her and clean other ones even though it wasn't my responsibility. Then one time I was helping her I noticed something and I knew I had to take advantage of this perfect opportunity to actually converse with her. So I walked up to her and asked her what her favorite color was? I told her my favorite color was pink... big lie. I actually said that because I caught a glimpse of her delicates when she bent over. She was wearing a pink thong! I remember she was kind of caught of guard that my favorite color was pink but she didn't think anything of it until it HIT her later. I thought that was pretty smooth but once again kind of childish. (PIC #2: The first picture of Jess I took)

Then I started catching her looking at me so I knew that I just had to build up the courage and ask her out. It was a busy night and I had been "cut" (allowed to go home after closing duties) when I noticed Jessica was still here. It was abnormally late for a hostess to be here so late but I realized that her sister was still here and she was rolling server's silverware for extra cash. That's when I decided that I had to do it. I remember a bad case of the butterflies just like before you box some one. I tried my best not to let her know how nervous I was... so I probably over did it.

I asked her nonchalantly, "So when are we going to hang out?"
She said something like, "I don't know."
"Well... Can I get your number?"
The killer reply right here, "You know I have a boyfriend?"
My heart skipped a beat but I told myself to be confident, "I don't care."

And Ladies and Gentleman that was that. She broke up with her boyfriend that night and we hung out the next.

(PIC #3: Here is a pic of some friends at work (Cara, Sarah, Cam, and Dave) by the way Sarah IS okay with living with cats just in case anyone is looking for a room mate.

........ And the story continues another time.

What a mistake....

2008-02-29T20:53:00.000-08:00

So this morning I am getting ready for work and doing the usual ...Brush my teeth ,get in the shower, dry off , put on my lotion and then get my deodorant but wait right when I open the deodorant (the actual deodorant not like the plastic part) it flies into my TOILET!!! So thinking its almost gone and I don't want to fish that out ewww!! I just flush it down the toilet..I can't even tell you what a HUGE ordeal this turned into!! Lets just say something called the "Snake", 3 plungers, and 2 hours later our toilet FINALLY flushes!!!

2008-02-25T18:54:00.001-08:00

My Favorite little girl Addison Rae..

2008-02-25T18:51:00.001-08:00

These are my sisters and my cute niece Addison..I was making her laugh

2008-02-25T18:21:00.000-08:00

When we went to the Roof they had the best desserts ever.. My Favorite were the strawberries (they were HUGE)!!

2008-02-25T18:19:00.001-08:00

2008-02-25T18:17:00.001-08:00

2008-02-25T18:14:00.001-08:00

2008-02-25T17:28:00.001-08:00

So I am very new to the blogging world...but really excited to have one FINALLY!! I live in Utah and I am married to John Holbrook...We have been married a year (Feb 10)....So we just celebrated our one year anniversary and we had so much fun! We went to Park City and skied.. And for it only being my second time skiing it was surprisingly really fun (the first time I went I broke my binding because I kept falling and had to walk down the mountain crying and pissed off haha)..So after that we went to The Roof and ate(we went there on our wedding day)so I guess that will be our new tradPublish Postition..