Happy

6 o'clock this morning I woke to Sophie throwing up in her bed, it was so sad. When I was cleaning her bedding the washer decided to stop, mid cycle. While I was scooping out water and ringing out barf bedding, I couldn't help but be happy that these were my problems today. 5 months ago, I would have given ANYTHING for these things to occupy my day. Instead, I was going crazy with ER/ doctor visits trying to get John on the right medication remedy. I can't express how grateful I am for the peace in my life these days. I can handle barf, and washer problems:)

Life

Here's a little update on our life. John has been seizure free since I last posted..Wahoo!! He will have strange feelings randomly, which probably are seizures, but since he is conscious, able to speak, and aware of his surroundings, the doctor is ok with that. And he will be able to drive in about 5 weeks. Yes, I have been his chauffeur for the last year, but I have happily done it, for the most part :)...

We finally met with the Epileptologist, and we were able to ask her a lot of questions. One question I had was, "Would John have to be on his medications for life, or would he be able to get off of them in a few years, if all goes well?"she said,"The meds are something he will have to take for the rest of his life." For some reason this made me sad. Don't get me wrong, I am so relieved/ happy we have medicine that's working. But, sometimes I just wish this could be over. And I guess the pills are just a reminder that its not. Currently there is no cure for Epilepsy. The pills are not a cure just a controller.

Last, Saturday we ran the Purple day 5k for Epilepsy.. I started training a few months ago when a friends told me about the race, and I wanted to get at least under 26mins, and I did (25:52)! While I was running I couldn't help but get emotional thinking about everything we/John have gone through in the last 2 years. A year ago this month John was officially diagnosed with Epilepsy. Its hard to look back and think of everything he had to go through on a daily basis, but I am so happy he is doing so well. The last two years have been such a struggle for me, but it feels good to be able to finally really relax, and enjoy life without those damn seizures. (sorry for the cuss word, but that's how I feel)

John is currently in a Surgery rotation, and next month he starts an OBGYN rotation. He only has 7 months left, and he will be done with school! I am pretty proud of him and myself, for getting through everything.

Here's a little quote I found on pinterest:

"It isn’t as bad as you sometimes think it is. It all works out. Don’t worry. I say that to

myself every morning. It will all work out. If you do your best, it will all work out. Put

your trust in God, and move forward with faith and confidence in the future. The Lord

will not forsake us. He will not forsake us. … If we will put our trust in Him, if we will

pray to Him, if we will live worthy of His blessings, He will hear our prayers." - Gordon

B. Hinckley

Update

About 8 weeks ago we were able to see a Neurologist and he started John on a new med and took away one of his other medication that didn't ever do much. We have seen a huge improvement so far. He no longer has 45 min repetitive seizures and he only has a seizure a week..His seizures have changed a lot, and you wouldn't even notice that he had one( they only are lasting 5 to 10 seconds). We went to the Neurologist again a week and a half ago and he increased John's dose of medicine, he is already at the max dose but he said some people just need a little stronger and then they are good to go.. Well, John has had one seizure since trying the new dose so we will see what happens.

We are feeling super blessed about this and are very grateful for a Neurologist that actually knows what he is doing, and has seen John's specific seizures. But, we just wish he didn't have the side effects from the medicine... ( Double vision, nausea, and feeling disconnected from his body) I hate that he has to feel that way. Life has felt so much more normal, I can't even remember the last time I saw him have a seizure. I was having some major anxiety issues because all of this ( watching my husband have 5 plus seizures a day was taking a toll on me), but since the seizures have been controlled I have felt very at peace, but then I feel bad because John has to deal the horrible side effects. I asked the doctor what if the extra dose doesn't work then what do we do? He said we will Just play around with Johns meds until we get 100% control with medications.

Sophie

This little girl is 18 months old, and deserves her own post. Here is a little bit about Sophie.

Sophie loves:

Momma and Dadda-She is very much a momma's girl though

Owls

apples-I should say she loves calling any fruit that's round an apple

Babies

Her Babba-I know she shouldn't still be drinking from a bottle, but she loves it.

Kitties-any animal really

Being outside

Anything sweet

Dancing

Dora

Elmo

Getting her fingernails painted- she usually only has patience for one hand at a time

Music

Books

Her new Kitchen

Coloring

Being spoiled by all her grandparents and aunts and uncles

Sophie dislikes:

Getting her diaper changed

Getting in her car seat

When people leave- She usually cries when people leave

Meat- she is not much of a meat eater

Being told No

Sophie can throw quit the tantrums, she is very dramatic, and has lots of personality..We love you so much girlie!

Random

Here are some random quotes that have been on my mind, and I just LOVE them.. I shared these in a talk about a year ago and came across the first one on pinterest the other day and it made refer back to my talk...

“God expects you to have enough faith and determination and enough trust in Him to keep moving, keep living, keep rejoicing. In fact, He expects you not simply to face the future; He expects you to embrace and shape the future—to love it and rejoice in it and delight in your opportunities. God is anxiously waiting for the chance to answer your prayers and fulfill your dreams, just as He always has. But He can’t if you don’t pray, and He can’t if you don’t dream. In short, He can’t if you don’t believe.” Elder Jeffery R. Holland

“The Lord… will try us until He knows what HE can do with us. He tried His Son Jesus. Thousands of years before he came upon the earth the Father had watched His course and knew that He could depend upon Him when the salvation of worlds should be at stake…. He will continue to try us, in order that he may place us in the highest positions in life and put upon us the most sacred responsibilities. It is in moments of disappointment, heartache, and loneliness that we often make decisions that forge our faith, molds our character, and fortifies our convictions about the only source of strength and solace that satisfies…And that is Jesus Christ.”

Lorenzo Snow